The last of Christmas left our house through the front door today and I say good riddance.
Our tree this year, while tall and beautiful, had very sharp and, as my kids put it, pokey needles. Decorating it was an exercise in pain. Even more so when we took the ornaments off yesterday afternoon. "Ow!" was heard repeatedly.
And that tree shed needles like it was going out of style. Fucking Christmas tree.
So what's a poor girl to do when the tree is gone and there's about 6 trillion reminders of it on the carpet? Why, she gets out her trusty vacuum cleaner of course. I whip out our Dyson and start cleaning up the needles when the vacuum starts making a bad noise. So I turn it off and check it out. Sure enough the little hose that connects the parts of the cleaner together is stuffed with pine needles and carpet fuzz. I spent 15 minutes cleaning that thing out only to have to do it again 5 minutes later. And another 20 minutes after that. Fucking vacuum cleaner.
Right now I think I could punch that smug British guy in the Dyson commercials right in the nose. And I think I'm going to set fire to the pieces of dry, old Christmas tree currently residing in the garage.
Our tree this year, while tall and beautiful, had very sharp and, as my kids put it, pokey needles. Decorating it was an exercise in pain. Even more so when we took the ornaments off yesterday afternoon. "Ow!" was heard repeatedly.
And that tree shed needles like it was going out of style. Fucking Christmas tree.
So what's a poor girl to do when the tree is gone and there's about 6 trillion reminders of it on the carpet? Why, she gets out her trusty vacuum cleaner of course. I whip out our Dyson and start cleaning up the needles when the vacuum starts making a bad noise. So I turn it off and check it out. Sure enough the little hose that connects the parts of the cleaner together is stuffed with pine needles and carpet fuzz. I spent 15 minutes cleaning that thing out only to have to do it again 5 minutes later. And another 20 minutes after that. Fucking vacuum cleaner.
Right now I think I could punch that smug British guy in the Dyson commercials right in the nose. And I think I'm going to set fire to the pieces of dry, old Christmas tree currently residing in the garage.
1 comment:
You should call or write the company. I always thought Dyson was supposed to be good. I guess you don't get what you pay for!
Even our artificial tree shed.
And our neighbor has a horrible evergreen, the ugliest damn thing, looks like Dr. Seuss trees, that sheds all year onto our driveway and the needles get tracked into our living room.
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