10 April 2008

My New Favorite Word

While perusing the April issue of Good Housekeeping magazine this morn over a cup of tea, I came across what is now my new favorite word: "uni-butt".

I think I almost laughed so hard tea came out my nose.

I'd not been aware of the term, "uni-butt", before but it's used to describe what happens when a girdle, or other shapewear, squeezes the buttocks together. Got a mental picture of that? It ain't pretty, folks.

I don't have that problem, not that I don't wear shapers. I do (love Assets from Target). It's just that I have let's say, a junk-free trunk. I prefer the term my friend Diane came up with to describe our mutual "affliction": the skillet-ass.

I am the anti-J. Lo. (and thank God for that - that woman, at least her public persona, drives me nutty).

Hips? Got 'em.

Thighs? Yup, you betch'a.

Butt? Uh, that's a negatory.

I'm just flat front and back and that's ok. It's just the way I'm built and no amount of lunges or leg lifts is going to fix that.

Uni-butt (*tee-hee*).

Ha-ha. Made you laugh.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't know what the obsession with the butt is about anyhow. When I was about six months along with the tree-hugger my (girl)friends came over and practically cheered for my newly rounded rear. "You finally got a butt!" one shouted, much to the amusement of my husband. Of course, when the baby weight came off so did my newly rounded caboose.

Unknown said...

I do not have a butt either. Us no butters should unite.